dane’s thing lately is resisting me. he is a good one but these past few days every time i mention that it’s time to go here or there he has a fit. he’s too busy having fun doing whatever he’s doing at the time to want to move on to the next thing. even if the next thing was petting a unicorn.
so we argue and i threaten and cajole and it’s exhausting.
and cassady is in the terrible twos which i never experienced with dane. three’s, yes. they were horrific.
so today i finally convince dane to get dressed (and that’s another 4 hours of ordering him around) and we head to the waterfront park where he has a really glorious time riding bikes and making friends.
i also reluctantly brought our dog who i don’t like taking anywhere because she’s a terrible listener and i have two things to look after already.
after a good while of playing, there are suddenly snacks and juice boxes everywhere and i, of course, did not bring anything. BECAUSE dane pleaded with me to go to the park first and the grocery store later. i should have remembered that kids are dumb and i should have done the reverse order. i am the grownup after all. but i was so tired of fighting battles that i gave in.
so cassady catches wind of all this food and drink and starts sobbing for any and all of it. so i convince dane to go to the restaurant which of course he resists. finally, he caves whining all the way and cassady crying because of the lack of juice in his face and ally the dog pulling me all over the place.
we eat. they cry. they cry because cassady has a car that dane snatched out of his hand. dane cries because he can’t figure out the transformer toy they have. (it’s more than meets the eye, dane). he cries because of too much peanut butter. it’s time to go because we are being rushed out of there. the waitress places the bill on the table while i’m still eating and says, “i’m putting this here because we are about to blow up”.
cassady cries because he wants to take the matchbox car home. i leave the restaurant without him. i don’t care how it looks. i know he’ll follow. he does. crying all the way. ally is pulling me so hard that i let her off the leash where she runs straight to a picnic in the park and destroys that mother effer. i am screaming at her, screaming at dane to go and GET HER PUSH HER. i am like a cartoon character running in circles from my toddler in the middle of the street frozen with tears to my fucking thieving dog.
i wrestle everyone and everything into the car, most likely bruising cassady trying to get him into is carseat.
it’s only noon.